Linkspam for 5-5-2008

[matgb]

• [Greta Christina] The Joy of Theoretical Non-Monogamy | Blowfish Blog
  I like this, sums up my fairly lazy position quite well: when you're not monogamous, the soap opera vanishes like a bad dream in daylight. The basic fact that you and your partner are living animals with normal libidos doesn't turn into a crisis
  (tags: relationships sex)
• BoJo might be a bozo¦ the concise edition » doctorvee
  Duncan follows up: My point was that the campaign from the left was a negative one against Boris rather than a positive one in favour of Ken Livingstone. Saying that you should vote against someone just because they are a Tory does not cut it [anymore]
  (tags: Boris+Johnson ken+livingstone london mayoralty)
• Nuclear threat sparked tea worry | BBC NEWS | UK
  Damn silly fules, coffee shortage far more important: The threat of a nuclear attack on the UK in the 1950s caused concern over the supply of tea, top-secret documents which have now been released reveal.
  (tags: funny history tea)
• Nightmare Playgrounds: Dark Roasted Blend
  Sculptures and emplacements in various kids playgrounds around the world. Naturally, we want a Cthulhu for Wellholme. For those that've seen part one before, part two was published Friday
  (tags: Cthulhu nightmares playground horror cool)
• Amazon worldwide bestseller table | Laid bare | Economist.com
  Best selling book on Amazon worldwide in March? 'Liberation' porn novel only available in German (although the author was born in Wimbledon).
  (tags: sex porn germany)
• Maddest Comment is Free Entry Ever - SpiritOf1976
  What's the worst Comment is Free article ever? Goggerty's travelogue, Peaches Geldoff's MySpace thing, Neil Clark's existence? Phil is running a series of polls.
  (tags: comment+is+free guardian polls)

Comments

[ginasketch.livejournal.com]

Re: first link.

except some people do not operate that way. I think it's wrong to say just because that works for some people it will for everyone. I'd feel like such a fake version of me if i said "yeah i don't care if my partner sleeps around" because I would care. And I know nothing will ever change that aspect of me.

I acknowledge I have a libido and am attracted to people, but i'm still monogamous. It makes me comfortable. There would be far more drama if it was the other way around.

[ginasketch.livejournal.com]

Oh and there are poly people on my f list that take relationship drama to a new extreme...:S

[matgb]

Oh, I know, but the point is that there shouldn't be a "norm" and a "weird", just what everyone involved is happy with.

This sort of article would help those with drama problems just calm down. Well, maybe. And there are some people that are "poly" that haven't actually come to terms with what that means, and perhaps aren't inclined to be non-monogamous, which sometimes doesn't help matters.

But then there's a difference between "sleeping around" and doing something with someone else—neither of us "sleeps around", we just sometimes do stuff with others. Rarely, but it happens.

[ginasketch.livejournal.com]

Oh, I know, but the point is that there shouldn't be a "norm" and a "weird", just what everyone involved is happy with.

agreed. everyone is different. Not judging people in open relationships. Just get a bit worried some people think it's the only way to be and that their way is the best way. I think a while back someone on a mutual friendslist said "why do we need monogamy? That's delving into religious territory!"

erm..okay? Stupid?

[thapunkprincess.livejournal.com]

Perhaps monogomy is the point where evolution meets religion.

[misscoollinda.livejournal.com]

I've found that to be very true.

[thapunkprincess.livejournal.com]

Theoretical non-monogamy? What a cop-out! Add to the ranks of theoretical anarchists who shop at WalMart and theoretical vegetarians who eat meat. Everyone's too damn theoretical.

[matgb]

Nah, slight difference. I'm lazy, but if the inclination strikes there's no problem, and I can flirt online as much as I like.

But arent you the one who studied a lot of theory? ;-)

[thapunkprincess.livejournal.com]

Studied a lot of theoretical women.

[misscoollinda.livejournal.com]

1st link: I think the problem arises when most people are raised to believe that they are supposed to be monogamous. You meet that special someone, who stay for life, you have kids etc. Anything else is supposedly wrong or immoral. Are kids from non-monogamous couples at a disadvantage? If the divorce rate is 50% or higher, how is that affecting kids? I'd like to see some research done on that.
As for me, I say, do what's right for you. Someone people can never say with one person, so why make them?

[matgb]

Are kids from non-monogamous couples at a disadvantage? If the divorce rate is 50% or higher, how is that affecting kids?

The biggest problem with it is the latter is now socially acceptable (in a way that wasn't 30 years ago) but the former isn't, so we are essentially very discrete (says the person writing under his own name who's carefully managed to make sure this site is top result for it).

I'd rather be as I am than serial monogamy.