Anyone want a job as a Homeopath?

[matgb]

Picking a paragraph to quote from for this was difficult. My application for a job as a Homeopath

I am a qualified doctor of Neuroscience, so am aware of many long and complex words which I often use to convince people I know what I’m talking about, when in reality I am just exploiting their ignorance for my own amusement. As such, I feel I would be an ideal candidate for the post of doctor of homeopathy.

I was tempted by the bit about Richard Littlejohn, the Desperate Dan fanclub reference was tempting, and the paragraph on the Placebo effect quite good as well. Basically, go and read. It's a genuine job application.

ETA: More posts on the subject: Anomalous Distraction, dcscience.net, Reality Is My Religion, torgwen's posterous

Athough I am comftable wit my knoledge of homepaty, and I liv neaby, I stll feel tht othr aplicants wit medcal quafications stnd a beter chnce thn me. Wit tht in mnd, I’ve dcided to remov caracters frm my words, as yu cn see. As a tru homepath, I flt tht th les caracters I usd in my wrds, th mor efective they woud be.

And this one I really like, from davidnm at his 'proper' blog:

My education so far includes two degrees in real sciences, a BSc in Physics and an MSc in Astrophysics, and I’m currently working toward a PhD in Astronomy. Thus one day, unlike your homeopath, I may actually be a doctor! As I have no actual medical qualifications, any medical knowledge in my brain is diluted to an extreme degree – and thus, from the basic principles of homeopathy, this means that I must be an extremely good doctor.

Comments

[karohemd]

Brilliant!

[matgb]

HAve edited for more, the first one's still the funniest, but the others are chuckleworthy too.

[karohemd]

Heh. To take the last one a step further, you should just hand in a blank page. When they ask where your application is, you should ask back why they can't read the nth degree diluted ink you used...

[http://www.nickbarlow.com/blog/]

I'd have just sent them a corner of the application form (which I'd have shaked and slapped first) on the grounds that it must be stronger than the whole thing.

[ginasketch]

lol WIN

[davidnm.livejournal.com]

That is hilarious. I'm going to have to jump on this bandwaggon, I think...

(Although more seriously, £68K for a homeopath?! A junior doctor is, what, £25K, I think? That's three of them, pretty much...)

[karohemd]

Not to mention the junior doctor will have a full week with long hours while this position is for two sessions a 8 hours a week.

[ginasketch]

Pah! Don't you know anything? It's a diluted work week.

[karohemd]

Duh, my bad.